Every year come February , consumers are subjected to a barrage of Valentine’s Day 💖 related paraphernalia, courtesy of corporate America and their clever marketing schemes. Each one of them trying to outdo the other in a haste to seduce the unsuspecting , besotted consumer into the fabricated world of materialistic romance.
Love suddenly becomes the most sought after and easily available commodity . Ranging anywhere from $5 for cheap, easy love , to over the top, made to order, and priced at six figures.Love❤️ladies and gentlemen is in the air , packaged ,priced and ready to sell.
But how exactly did we get here, what makes Valentine’s Day one of the sought after holidays post xmas?
Even though most historical records credit Saint Valentine as being the brain child of Valentine’s Day . It was good old Chaucer who in the 14th century, officially associated romance with Valentine’s Day upon realizing that :
A)-365 days of reciting love sonnets was too much strain on his limited, medieval vocabulary,
B)-non stop courting by the moonlight was turning him into an insomniac and
C)-he was running out of items to barter in exchange for herbal viagra.
However up to the 18th century the most fervor displayed during Valentine’s Day was the exchange of handmade cards by a besotted few.
It wasn’t until the 21st century that corporations and the mass media realized the potential of commercial exploitation of old Chaucer’s decision . And Valentine’s Day evolved into the commercialized, laced with reciprocal intent, somewhat obligated transaction that we know and love today💘.
The typical Valentine’s Day consumer usually falls into one of the three categories :
1- The Celebrators,🎉
these starry eyed propagators of everlasting romance( usually comprising of newly weds still in the honeymoon phase, and those in the initial, heady throes of romance , oblivious to impending future disasters ) are ready and willing to scoop up all things pink and red and throbbing with passion 😳 in an attempt to woe their beloved.
From overpriced flowers , gourmet chocolates , edible undies and cheesy cards, to Kim Kardashian’s Valentine’s Day special butt and boob venom 😳. These smitten, swooning, over the nauseatingly cheery duo’s are ready to hop onto the love train with aplomb💘.
2- The obligated spenders,💸
This griping ,eye rolling, profoundly sighing group usually comprises of members of the heterogametic sex , who participate in the love fest out of :
A) sheer obligation to prove their undying love and loyalty for the umpteenth time,
B) An opportunity to score bonus points to be redeemed later on in the year – read forgotten birthdays , obscure anniversaries, wet towels on the bed etc..
C)mainly to avoid being in the dog house with their significant other- Read sleeping on the couch and no home runs.
3-The lonely haters club,👤
This group includes all the self deprecating, cynical, sulky, vindictive( read freshly dumped), self piteous single people.
These purveyors of anti romantic sentiments while harshly criticizing their happily cooing counterparts, are desperately seeking soul mates ( read -tinder, okcupid, zoosk).
Ready to shed their masks of emphatic hatred towards all things mushy and pink and join the ranks of the happily ever afters💞.
So that’s it for this Valentine’s Day roundup, let me know which category you happen to fall into this year✨
Until next time xoxo💋!